Tuesday's Tot Talks: Toddler Schemas

At this time when I am facing more time with a 2 1/2 year old than I've ever spent in my life, I am trying to find creative ways to keep her entertained and keep my own sanity as well. Molly is very well behaved and very independent, and we don't have too many behaviour problems with her (knock on wood). She is adapting very well to having Lucy at home and to being at home with me - but I think this is still the "honeymoon" period. I am SO grateful that the weather is starting to improve because we can get outside for walks/picnics/playground dates/beach time (in the summer) etc. etc. In my experience, a kid who is outside is a happy kid. (Or maybe that's just my kid, but it seems pretty true overall).

At a petting zoo last fall

I came across an article awhile ago (that I can't find again) which referenced toddler schemas. A schema is a pattern of behaviour, and the article basically suggested that if you can find out what your toddler's schema is and support it, you will have an easier time helping them learn and keeping them entertained. These articles talk about this idea more:

Schemas and play
Toddler Schemas
Tinkergarten
Via Pinterest
The Urge to Play

Basically, the way I see this, Molly LOVES to collect things into a box/bucket/cart and cart them around with her. She is also absolutely and completely obsessed with this matching game that my in-laws got her for Christmas, which made me think about her schema this week. Molly will literally play the "bear game" all day long from the moment she wakes up until bedtime...but unfortunately, she still wants to play it with someone else (which is fine, but I am a bit sick of it ;)). I have never seen her play with a toy more than this one...so I am thinking of making her some similar flash cards to match up with different animals or shapes or something.

She loves puzzles too. She is a little bit of a climber, but nothing TOO major. She also really enjoys playing with playdough and helping me bake - so I think she is creative in that sense. I'd say Molly's top 3 schemas that she uses the most are containment, positioning and trajectory.

Do you see your child following any schemas? Do you like following this concept to support your child's learning? Any tips for entertaining my little 2 year old all year?? :)

I'm working on Lucy's birth story for next Tuesday but I'll be back once or twice this week with some other posts too :) I am finding myself on Pinterest a lot more now that I am back to night feeding sessions and I'm still keeping up with blogs on Bloglovin' but not finding quite as much time to comment. I'm trying to keep up with those who comment on my own blog though!!

5 on Friday :)

Hope everyone survived the week!! It was another snowy one in Halifax, but I realized today that spring is just one month away!!! Can't wait!!

I'm linking up today with the 5 on Friday girls...Check out the other posts with Darci, April, Christina and Natasha!

--ONE--

Go Team Canada!! 
We had a nail-biting game against the US Women in hockey yesterday, and today's should be the same for Canada vs. US in Men's hockey. Overall, I am so proud of how my country is doing at these Olympics though! I'm not sure if we will get the same number of medals as we did in Vancouver, but I think our athletes are excelling and some lesser-known players achieved great things!! I really think we need to medal in men's hockey though...just a personal opinion. :) My hubby is considering taking the afternoon off work to watch the game today...haha I might just do the same ;) Day date?! I could get on board with that.

I think this picture on Twitter sums up our feelings about today, but I'd rather the men make it a little bit less stressful for us than the women did yesterday:

(Via)

--TWO--

I am seriously considering adopting the no-shampoo method sometime this spring/summer. I don't feel like I can try it yet, because I know my hair is going to go through some crazy changes after I have the baby, but I am pretty intrigued by it. I've read a lot on Amanda's blog about her experience with it, and although my hair is really OK right now, I definitely think it could be fuller and healthier. I have always steered away from trying this because I am scared of the transition phase, but I'm thinking that if I give it a go while I am on maternity leave, it won't be as big of a deal to have gross hair for a week or 2 (I will be spending time mostly with a 2 year old and a newborn who don't care how my hair looks!). Has anyone tried it? I'm going to look into it more, but I am really very interested in the method. In case you aren't familiar with it, you basically "wash" your hair with a baking soda mixture/vinegar rinse every 4-5 days, and the natural oils take care of the rest. It's very interesting :)

--THREE--

Molly had her first dentist appointment this week and she was so good! When it came time to pick out a "prize" at the end, she OF COURSE picked a bouncy ball out of all the toys. She actually wanted to take about 6 things home (she's a bit of a hoarder), but settled on a ball (we only have about 500 balls at home - no big deal, haha).Our new dentist also has a TV screen on the ceiling for kids (and adults) to watch while they are getting their teeth cleaned. Unfortunately, no Bubble Guppies, and we (apparently) have very little interest in My Little Pony, so Molly was still very squirmy but she did well!!

Having fun :)

--FOUR--

I found this Buzzfeed list about 30 things everyone does that you'd never realized and it made me laugh. I don't do all of these things, but Brian does A LOT of them, and it is funny to realize that we are all alike in some ways!!

I also saw this list on Pinterest this week and it totally cracked me up. The things that make toddlers cry or throw tantrums are hilarious and I can completely relate this photo roll to the random events that make Molly melt down sometimes.

--FIVE--

Molly had her supper one night this week in a muffin tin. I used to do this for her all the time, and it's great because now she is old enough to understand that she has to try at least one food item from each cup. There are tons of ideas for muffin tin meals here on this blog (a resource I had totally forgotten about!). This one wasn't my most creative muffin tin, but it is oranges, whole grain spaghetti, strawberries, and meatballs :)

The baby bump appears in this pic too - so I didn't edit it! haha

Hope everyone has a great weekend - any fun plans?? We are getting together with both of our families, which will be nice, and it's supposed to go up to 6 and 7 degrees Saturday/Sunday, which Brian considers to be "t-shirt weather" (haha!) so I'm thinking we will do something outside!!

Linking up with Whitney this week too...here's another Canadian song for our hockey men today!!!

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Preparing your toddler for the birth of a new sibling (Tuesday's Tot Talks)

After having Molly, Brian and I both knew that we wanted another baby someday, but we took our time to figure out when would be best. We were overjoyed when we found out that a new baby would be joining our family and we couldn’t wait to tell Molly. At age 2 ½ (almost), I don’t think she 100% understands the idea of a new person in the family, but she is a VERY adaptable child and we aren’t too worried about how she will do when the new baby comes. I know there will be some good days and bad days, and some adjusting for all of us, but Molly loves babies and loves to talk to the baby in my belly all the time. She truly (so far) seems excited about it…but I don’t think she fully understands the baby’s permanence in our lives ;)

My current "baby" ;)

There are moments when I wonder as a mother how I can love another child as much as I love Molly. As our first, she will always hold that special place in our hearts because we’ve loved her longest, but I know that the new baby will make our family so special and I can’t wait to give Molly the gift of a sibling (a relationship that I have benefited from having for most of my life.)

We have brainstormed a few things that we can do to ease this transition for ourselves and for Molly too, and I wanted to share these ideas because I know this is an event that many parents encounter at one point or another.

Here’s what we’ve been doing during my pregnancy to help Molly understand the changes that are coming:

1. I encourage her to touch my belly and feel the baby move
2. I encourage her to talk to the baby and “introduce” herself
3. We have told her about events going on this summer (such as a Raffi concert in June) that we will be going to with her without the baby, but we’ve also been talking about things that we will do with the baby once s/he is here 
4. Molly has a few "babies" of her own and she loves to care for them
5. We have a few books that we've read with her about being a big sibling and welcoming a new baby
6. We have pointed out other groups of siblings that we know

Here are some plans we have for when the baby comes:

1. Closer to my due date, we are going to take Molly out to pick out a present to give the new baby from herself. 
2. We are also going to be giving her a small present when I go into the hospital and she spends time with my in-laws
3. We have a couple of little “new” toys on hand for Molly for the weeks after the baby’s birth when the baby will be getting a lot of new presents from visitors
4. We plan to let Molly help with certain baby activities (I know she will LOVE this) such as bath time, picking out clothes for the baby to wear for the day, and reading the baby stories or singing to the baby

Additionally, I have heard that it can be a good idea (as the mother) to ensure that your husband is holding the new baby or that the new baby is in the bassinet in the hospital when your oldest comes in to see you for the first time (so you can focus all of your attention on your oldest child for a few minutes after possibly not seeing them for a day or two).

Having a dance party

We are fortunate in that Molly feels very close to a large number of different people – she is very close to my husband, to several of her friends, to my in-laws, my parents/siblings and a few extended family members. She will easily spend time with these people without clinging to me, and I know that she will be excited for all the visitors that we see after the baby’s birth (for instance, my mom is coming out for 2 weeks from Calgary and Molly is SO excited). I am so glad that we have helped Molly to nurture these relationships and spend time with other family members, because I think it will make it easier for her to adjust.

Our only other worry is that Molly’s sleep will be disturbed with the new baby waking up in the night. There is really nothing that we can do to prepare for this, and we are hopeful that the sleep disturbance will be minimal. The baby will be sleeping in our room for a few months, so hopefully Molly won’t hear him/her crying in the night too frequently.

Here are some other great posts and tips about this topic from A Cup of Jo, Dr. Greene, Pregnancy.org, Little Hearts Books, and Beauty Through Imperfection.

Potty Training Tips (Tuesday Tot Talks)

Unrelated but adorable picture:

Disclaimer: If you don't want to read a lot about pee, this post probably isn't for you.

I'm actually sure this post will only appeal to a small number of people who are actually LOOKING for advice on potty training, but I wanted to write about our experience so that I can remember it the next time around and because it worked SO WELL for us that it feels like I'm keeping a secret if I don't at least share my tips.

I should also mention at this time that Molly is about 95% potty trained and only wears a diaper overnight (and if she naps at the babysitter's house). She wakes up occasionally in the morning with a dry diaper, but not frequently enough for us to venture into night-time training yet. We are thinking we will night-train her when we have the new baby, since I will be getting up in the night anyway, and if she needs to get up to pee in the middle of the night, it won't be as disruptive as it would be now. She is 2 years 4 months old, and we trained her the week she turned 2.

Here are some questions I researched before we trained her and my own answers:

How do I know if my toddler is ready to be toilet trained?

I think we were lucky in this regard, because some of the other little kids at Molly's in-home daycare were training right before she did, and she became a bit fascinated with the concept. She would ask to use the toilet, and we let her. One day, we just decided to give it a go with her and we went and bought this potty and 2 seats for the toilets as well. In my opinion, it will help if your child can talk/communicate with you, but that's also probably unique to each situation. I've heard that girls are easier to train than boys, but I don't really have any experience other than with my girl :)

What is the best method for training?

This will be unique to each parent and child, but I'll tell you what worked for us. We committed to staying home for about 2-3 days (overall - this doesn't mean I didn't leave the house at all) and I asked her about every 10-15 minutes if she had to use the potty. She went around with underwear on or naked in the house for the 2 days and if we went to the backyard, the potty came with us. I'm not going to lie and say this part was easy, because we had A LOT of accidents in those few days, but she started to get the hang of it by the end and went longer stretches without using the potty or having an accident. In some ways, we kind of followed the 3 day method which is HERE, but we stretched it out. For about a week or two after this, we would put a diaper on her when we went out to run errands, but eventually she became able to tell us when she had to use the washroom and we could rush her to a toilet ASAP while she held it.

How long can you expect accidents?

Molly still had the occasional accident for several weeks after we started training her. It took her a LONG time to be able to #2 on the potty/toilet too, and this was a major issue (but apparently normal). She has had a sporadic accident once or twice in the past month if she is extremely distracted, because we don't periodically ask her if she needs to use the bathroom anymore (she just tells us).

Rewards?





I should also mention that we rewarded her with treats for the first week or so. 1 Skittle or 1 M&M or 1 mini marshmallow for using the potty, and 2 if it was a #2 on the potty.

I'll update this post once we train Molly at night too with any tips we might have for that component of training. I know a lot of people do it all at once, but we just weren't quite ready yet (and Molly was not in a single bed until closer to Christmas so she was still in a crib when we trained her).

Being present. - Tuesday's tot talks

Now that Molly is a fully aware 2 year old, she can be very cognizant of us being on our phones while she is either wanting help with something or wanting to play at home. I have made a conscious effort to stay off my cell phone when I'm at home with her unless it is either a) very important that I check something or make a call etc. or b) a time when she is enjoying an activity on her own and I want to take a second to check it. She is very keenly aware of technology for her age, which is something that my generation (saying that makes me feel OLD) never really experienced. For instance, she knows that she can play games on a cell phone or tablet, watch videos on a phone or tablet or computer, and she knows all about taking pictures on a phone, looking at pictures (swyping through them, even!) and she loves using Skype (we talk to my family via Skype at least once a week).

At the beach last spring

At times, it can be hard to be fully present with her at home because it is my time away from work too, and sometimes I want a little bit of "me-time" or "down-time". Our time at home is also busy with cooking, cleaning, housework and other things that need to get done. Brian and I are trying to encourage Molly to play independently at times, which doesn't mean that we leave her alone or anything, but that we step back and let her explore her toys on her own without constantly relying on us for help or entertainment. While we want to encourage her independence, we also want her to communicate with us and we want her to know that she is important and special to us. The times when I consciously try to sit and talk to her about what she is doing or play with her, I always find myself feeling very happy because she is SO happy to be spending time with me. There is happiness in simple activities with her. Our time together is so precious when it is only a couple of hours on weekdays and all day on weekends. I want to cherish it and soak it all up. I am especially mindful of it lately because I know my time with her will be a bit stretched when the new baby arrives in April, and I want to implicitly reassure her that she is loved beyond measure.

Doing puzzles at home 

Molly Likes to Help
In the past 6 months or so, I have embraced the fact that Molly often wants to help me with whatever I am doing. Therefore, if I am washing dishes and she wants to help by standing on a chair next to me, I usually let her even though it's messier and it takes longer. She also loves to help with laundry...putting it in the washer, sorting it and putting it away. She likes to help unload the dishwasher (although this requires very alert supervision, haha!). Basically, what I have come to realize is that sometimes she just wants to do what I (or Brian) am doing, and I'm definitely fine with that. I read something once about building confidence in toddlers by letting them help. By letting them help you with something, they learn that they are capable, and they learn that they are can be valuable. They also learn new skills, as long as they are supervised well :)

Being Present with your child helps their development
When you are playing with your child or letting them help you with something, they learn new words, new skills, and boundaries. For instance, Molly has recently learned the phrase "don't do that again" when she does something that we would prefer for her not to do (like remove her diaper herself in the middle of the night and pee in bed - a story for another day). She remembers in the future that certain things are dangerous (she learned a long time ago to stay away from the oven) and certain things are for adults only.

These moments will not last forever
People are constantly telling us parents that you can blink and your child will be a teenager. I find this to be particularly true when you are not with your child all the time - for instance, if you are a working mother (although I'm sure it's true for all parents). Every day is a new day with a new development for children, and I, for one, don't want to miss out on anything even if I might not remember it clearly in a year. :)

Molly and her minion

I know that a lot of what I've said is old news for everyone, because the idea of "being present" is such a trend these days and people are always considering it to be a resolution or something to strive for - but I think that's great. I think being aware of the amount of time we spend on technology at home is IMPORTANT. It's also important to cherish those moments with a young one, because they grow so quickly that you won't always get the moments back later.

What do you think about it? Is there a line between giving a toddler TOO much attention and making them feel cherished? (I think there definitely is - and independence is important too!)

14 days into 2014 - Toddler Speech Development (Tuesday Tot Talk)

Happy Tuesday, everyone! The proclaimed “worst day of the week”! I actually usually find Mondays a bit more challenging, but today it was tough getting out the door. Molly is daytime potty-trained and has been for a few months now, but we still put a diaper on at night…except for last night when we forgot to. That resulted in some quick laundry this morning before work! Oops!!! Mommy fail last night!

I started a series talking about kid stuff on Tuesdays, and I’m hoping to resume that now in the new year. I call it “Tuesday Tot Talks” and I’ll try to keep most kiddie talk to Tuesdays on my blog. Today, I want to talk about helping your child learn to talk.

Molly was a late talker, so much so that we requested a speech and hearing assessment at 18 months when she was only speaking a few syllables. We were on a waiting list for months, during which time she improved dramatically, and we finally met with the speech pathologist right before Christmas.  The assessment went well, and she scored well with some suggestions for improving a few syllables. I have been working with her on the suggestions and she has been talking up a storm for the past month or so.

Here are some tips I’ve learned that you can implement to help your toddler learn to speak:

1. Engage them in conversation. Ask questions and wait for them to answer, even if they don’t answer correctly.
2. Make easy corrections in conversation. For instance, Molly always says “go” instead of “no”, but we know she is saying no because of her tone (she also says “go” for “go”). Simply correcting her by saying, “do you mean, ‘no’?” can help her to realize that she is saying the word a bit incorrectly. 
3. Ask your child to repeat after you. We do this all the time with Molly, especially if she is saying a word incorrectly or you are trying to introduce a new word or phrase. She is usually more than happy to oblige. For instance, we are trying to teach her “please” and “thank you” so we encourage her to say these when someone helps her with something or gives her something.
4. Do not respond with the incorrect word. By this, I mean, if she says “downgoes” instead of “downstairs” (which she does), YOU, as the adult, should still always be saying downstairs. My husband sometimes mimics what she is saying so that he can communicate with her, but this just reinforces the incorrect speech pattern.
5. Be patient if the child is trying to say something, but you can’t decipher it. A few times, Molly has been adamantly saying words to us that we simply cannot understand, and it really frustrates her. A week ago, she was trying to say that she wanted to have a dance party downstairs before supper (which we often do after work). She was saying “da goey” which was confusing to Brian and me, and she just kept saying it and pointing until one of us clued in, but she was getting a bit upset. It happens frequently, but it will get better, and she is trying really hard to communicate, which is a positive thing.
6. Facial expressions and tone can help you to understand what your child is saying, too. See below...Molly is saying "I don't want to be Molly Potter, Mommy!" haha.

One thing we are really working on with Molly these days is helping her to fix some of the words that she has gotten into the habit of saying incorrectly (i.e. go instead of no)...we know she can say the "n" syllable, but she is in the habit of saying it the wrong way. Eventually, I am confident that she will be fine, though.

Last night, she came down from her bath looking for her "buggles" (puzzles). Brian thought she was looking for a bagel...which she has never eaten...it was pretty funny actually.

Here are some other links on this topic:
Toddler talk
10 ways to get toddlers to talk
Tips to get toddlers talking

Hope everyone has a great day! Tomorrow I have a book review of the Divergent series on the blog :)